Of so many canvases, I plead, choose mine.
To test your passionate strokes, and wear your enchanting affections.
Drench my edges with warmth, and fill my center with your sunshine.
Color me with adoration and dry me with respect.
And when you reveal to the world your creation, they shall not awe at its flamboyancy, but at its
abstract resemblance of our love.
“People get from books the idea that if you have married the right person you may expect to go on ‘being in love’ for ever. As a result, when they find they are not, they think this proves they have made a mistake and are entitled to a change — not realising that, when they have changed, the glamour will presently go out of the new love just as it went out of the old one. In this department of life, as in every other, thrills come at the beginning and do not last. The sort of thrill a boy has at the first idea of flying will not go on when he has joined the R.A.F. and is really learning to fly. The thrill you feel on first seeing some delightful place dies away when you really go to live there. Does this mean it would be better not to learn to fly and not to live in the beautiful place? By no means. In both cases, if you go through with it, the dying away of the first thrill will be compensated for by a quieter and more lasting kind of interest. What is more (and I can hardly find words to tell you how important I think this), it is just the people who are ready to submit to the loss of the thrill and settle down to the sober interest, who are then most likely to meet new thrills in some quite different direction. The man who has learned to fly and become a good pilot will suddenly discover music; the man who has settled down to live in the beauty spot will discover gardening.
This is, I think, one little part of what Christ meant by saying that a thing will not really live unless it first dies. It is simply no good trying to keep any thrill: that is the very worst thing you can do. Let the thrill go — let it die away — go on through that period of death into the quieter interest and happiness that follow — and you will find you are living in a world of new thrills all the time.”
“I really cared about what other people thought about me and I would go out of the way to make them happy at my own expense. But they would end up doing what they wanted anyway. I kept trying to get over them, like it wasn’t a big deal or I did it wrong: but soon found quickly, I had to get over myself first.
I had to quit trying to control the world around me with a desperate twisted-up death grip. I had to learn that part of love is letting go of other people’s perceptions and just letting them love me on their own. It matters less now what people think of me and just that they think at all. So I started saying ‘no’ more often: because not everything is okay with me and I shouldn’t have to explain myself. My happiness is not contingent on you getting some fake yes-version of me.”